Ok one more thing .....the song i have playing ......Is it time for a change?????? let me know if your leaving a comment. 

 

 

 

         C-Ya ...All

             

 

 

             For centuries, Hindu women have worn a red spot on their foreheads. We in the west have always naively thought that it had something to do with their religion. This has recently been revealed by the Indian Embassy in Ottawa.

             When one of these women gets married, she brings with her a dowry. On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the red spot to see if he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a doughnut shop or a motel in Canada.

 

 

                    If he gets a 'SORRY, PLEASE TRY AGAIN', he is destined to a lifetime of driving a taxi.

                     " the same thing I always tell them: 'you don't have to drink or smoke to have a good time.'" 

                              A 80-year old man goes to the doctor for a checkup.

              The doctor is amazed at what good shape the guy is in and asks, "How do you stay in such great physical condition?

      " I'm a golfer," says the old guy, "and that's why I'm in such good shape. I'm up well before daylight and out golfing up and down the fairways."

              "Well," says the doctor, "I'm sure that helps, but there's got to be more to it. How old was your dad when he died?"

              "Who said my dad's dead?"

              The doctor is amazed. "You mean you're 80 years old and your dad's still alive. How old is he?"

              "He's 100 years old," says the old golfer. "In fact he golfed with me this morning, and that's why he's still alive . . . he's a golfer too."       "Well," the doctor says, "that's great, but I'm sure there's more to it than that. How about your dad's dad? How old was he when he died?"

              "Who said my grandpa's dead?"

               Stunned, the doctor asks, "You mean you're 80 years old and your grandfather's still living! Incredible, how old is he?"

              "He's 118 years old," says the old golfer. .

              The doctor is getting frustrated at this point, "So, I guess he went golfing with you this morning too?"

             "No. Grandpa couldn't go this morning because he's getting married today."

              At this point the doctor is close to losing it. "Getting married!! Why would a 118 year-old guy want to get married?"

 

 

                                "Who said he wanted to?"

                       The average age of the military man is 19 years.

       

 

                      He is a short haired, tight-muscled kid who, under normal circumstances is considered by society as half man, half boy. Not yet dry behind the ears, not old enough to buy a beer, but old enough to die for his country.

                    He never really cared much for work and he would rather wax his own car than wash his father's; but he has never collected unemployment either. He's a recent High School graduate; he was probably an average student, pursued some form of sport activities, drives a ten year old jalopy, and has a steady girlfriend that either broke up with him when he left, or swears to be waiting when he returns from half a world away.

                    He listens to rock and roll or hip-hop or rap or jazz or swing and 155mm howitzer. He is 10 or 15 pounds lighter now than when he was at home because he is working or fighting from before dawn to well after dusk. He has trouble spelling, thus letter writing is a pain for him, but he can field strip a rifle in 30 seconds and reassemble it in less time in the dark. He can recite to you the nomenclature of a machine gun or grenade launcher and use either one effectively if he must.

                    He digs foxholes and latrines and can apply first aid like a professional. He can march until he is told to stop or stop until he is told to march. He obeys orders instantly and without hesitation, but he is not without spirit or individual dignity. He is self-sufficient. He has two sets of fatigues: he washes one and wears the other. He keeps his canteens full and his feet dry. He sometimes forgets to brush his teeth, but never to clean his rifle. He can cook his own meals, mend his own clothes, and fix his own hurts.

                     If you're thirsty, he'll share his water with you; if you are hungry, his food. He'll even split his ammunition with you in the midst of battle when you run low. He has learned to use his hands like weapons and weapons like they were his hands. He can save your life - or take it, because that is his job. He will often do twice the work of a civilian, draw half the pay and still find ironic humor in it all. He has seen more suffering and death then he should have in his short lifetime. !!!!

                     He has stood atop mountains of dead bodies, and helped to create them. He has wept in public and in private, for friends who have fallen in combat and is unashamed. He feels every note of the National Anthem vibrate through his body while at rigid attention, while tempering the burning desire to 'square-away' those around him who haven't bothered to stand, remove their hat, or even stop talking. In an odd twist, day in and day out, far from home, he defends their right to be disrespectful. Just as did his Father, Grandfather, and Great-grandfather, he is paying the price for our freedom. Beardless or not, he is not a boy. He is the Canadian Fighting Man that has kept this country free for over 200 years. He has asked nothing in return, except our friendship and understanding.

 

                    Remember him, always, for he has earned our respect and admiration with his blood. And now we even have woman over there in danger, doing their part in this tradition of going to War when our nation calls us to do so. As you go to bed tonight, remember this ....

                                 Prayer Wheel

            "Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands. Protect them as they protect us. Bless them and their families for the selfless acts they perform for us in our time of need. Amen."

                   

 

 

                    When you receive this, please stop for a moment and say a prayer for our ground troops in Afghanistan, sailors on ships, and airmen in the air, and for those in Iraq. There is nothing attached.... This can be very powerful....... Of all the gifts you could give a US and/or Canadian Soldier, Sailor, Coastguardsman, Marine or Airman, prayer is the very best .

                             

 

                          Pass it on to someone and pray.

 

                   A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting:                   "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general and all in the name of humor!" 

               The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little smart ass on your knee."

                 Last week I was in Trenton, Ontario. attending a conference. While I was in the airport, returning home, I heard several people behind me beginning to clap and cheer. I immediately turned around and witnessed one of the greatest act's of patriotism I have ever seen. Moving thru the terminal was a group of soldiers in their camo's, as they began heading to their gate everyone (well almost everyone) was abruptly to their feet with their hands waving and cheering.

                 When I saw the soldiers, probably 30-40 of them, being applauded and cheered for it hit me. I'm not alone. I'm not the only red blooded Canadian who still loves this country and supports our troops and their families. Of course I immediately stopped and began clapping for these young unsung heroes who are putting their lives on the line everyday for us so we can go to school, work and home without fear or reprisal.

                Just when I thought I could not be more proud of my country or of our service men and women a young girl, not more than 6 or 7 years old, ran up to one of the male soldiers.

              He kneeled down and said "hi," the little girl then she asked him if he would give something to her daddy for her. The young soldier, he didn't look any older than maybe 22 himself, said he would try and what did she want to give to her daddy.

              Then suddenly the little girl grabbed the neck of this soldier, gave him the biggest hug she could muster and then kissed him on the cheek.

             The mother of the little girl, who said her daughter's name was Courtney, told the young soldier that her husband was a Corporal and had been in Afghanistan for 11 months now. As the mom was explaining how much her daughter, Courtney, missed her father, the young soldier began to tear up.

            When this temporarily single mom was done explaining her situation, all of the soldiers huddled together for a brief second. Then one of the other servicemen pulled out a military looking walkie-talkie. They started playing with the device and talking back and forth on it.

            After about 10-15 seconds of this, the young soldier walked back over to Courtney, bent down and said this to her, "I spoke to yourdaddy and he told me to give this to you." He then hugged this little girl that he had just met and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He finished by saying "your daddy told me to tell you that he loves you more than anything and he is coming home very soon."

            The mom at this point was crying almost uncontrollably and as the young soldier stood to his feet he saluted Courtney and her mom.

            I was standing no more than 6 feet away from this entire event unfolded. As the soldiers began to leave, heading towards their gate, people resumed their applause. As I stood there applauding and looked around, their were very few dry eyes, including my own.

          That young soldier in one last act of selflessness, turned around and blew a kiss to Courtney with a tear rolling down his cheek.We need to remember everyday all of our soldiers and their families and thank God for them and their sacrifices. At the end of the day, it's good to be a Canadian.

 

 

                                         Red Friday

 Just keeping you "in the loop" so you'll know what's going on in case this takes off.

            Red Friday---------- Very soon, you will see a great many people wearing Red every Friday.

           The reason? Canadian who support our troops used to be called the "silent majority". We are no longer silent, and are voicing our love for God, country and home in record breaking numbers. We are not organized, boisterous or over-bearing. We get no liberal media coverage on TV, to reflect our message or our opinions.

            Many Canadians, like you, me and all our friends, simply want to recognize that the vast majority of Canada supports our troops. Our idea of showing solidarity and support for our troops with dignity and respect starts this Friday -and continues each and every Friday until the troops all come home, sending a deafening message that.. Every red-blooded Canadian who supports our men and women afar will wear something Red.

             By word of mouth, press, TV -- let's make our Canada on every Friday a sea of red much like a homecoming football game in the bleachers. If every one of us who loves this country will share this with acquaintances, co-workers, friends, and family. It will not be long before Canada is covered in RED and it will let our troops know the once "silent" majority is on their side more than ever, certainly more than the media lets on.

 

 

 

                The first thing a soldier says when asked "What can we do to make things better for you?" is...We need your support and your prayers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                  A retired corporate executive, now a widower, decided to take a Vacation. He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank. He found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts. After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore. In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?" She replies, "I rowed from the other side of the island. I landed here when my cruise ship sank." "Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you. "Oh, this thing?" explains the woman. "I made the boat out of raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from a tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm branches, and the sides and stern came from a Eucalyptus tree." "But, where did you get the tools?" "Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. "On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found if I fired it to a certain temperature in my kiln, it melted into ductile iron..I used that for tools and used the tools to make the hardware. The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my place," she says. After a few minutes of rowing, she docks the boat at a small wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a stone walk leading to an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, "It's not much, but I call it home. Sit down, please. Would you like a drink?" "No! No thank you," he blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop of coconut juice." "It's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you like a Pina Colada?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they have exchanged their stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There is a razor upstairs in the bathroom cabinet." No longer questioning anything, the man goes into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet, a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What next?" When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but vines, strategically positioned, and smelling faintly of gardenias. She beckons for him to sit down next to her. "Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've been out here for many months. You've been lonely. There's something I'm sure you really feel like doing r ight now, something you've been longing for?" She stares into his eyes. He can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean . . " he swallows excitedly and tears start to form in his eyes.

 

 

 

 

 

"Don't tell me you've built a Golf Course!"

 

 

SO, WHAT DO CANADIANS HAVE TO BE PROUD OF?

 

1. Smarties

2. Crispy Crunch

3. The size of our footballs fields and one less down

4. Baseball is Canadian

5. Lacrosse is Canadian

6. Hockey is Canadian

7. Basketball is Canadian

8. Apple pie is Canadian

9. Mr. Dress-up kicks Mr. Rogers>butt

10. Tim Hortons kicks Dunkin' Donuts butt

11. In the war of 1812, started by America, Canadians pushed the Americans back...past their 'White House'. Then we burned  it...and most of Washington.

12. Canada has the largest French population that never surrendered to Germany.

13. We have the largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war to anyone. anywhere. EVER. 

14. Our civil war was fought in a bar and it lasted alittle over a half hour.

15. The only person who was arrested in our civil war was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing... but showed up just in time to get caught.

17. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth's surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.

18. We don't marry our kin-folk.

19. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers, insulin, penicillin, the telephone and short wave radios that save countless lives each year.

20. We ALL have frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it.

21. A Canadian invented Superman.

22. We have coloured money.

23. Our beer advertisments kick butt

24. Coffee Crisp

25. We don't bomb our allies

26. Our elections only take one day

27. We invented zambonis>

 

>>>> >>> >>> >>>> >>> >>BUT MOST IMPORTANT:> >>>> >>> >>> >>>> >>> >>> >>>> >>> >>

28. The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fit your hands with mitts on.

> >>>> >>> >>> >>>> >>I AM CANADIAN!!!<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

               A Newfie & a Lawyer

 

 

                 A Newfie calls up his lawyer and asks. "Wid all them there lawsuits going on, I'm feeling kinda left out . How do I get in on some of that action? I hear that people are suing the cigarette companies 'cause they got cancer, and others are suing the Big Mac company cause they got themselves fat." His lawyer asks, "And which one of those categories do you fit under?" The Newfie, God bless his soul answers .... "Neider, I just wanna know if I can sue Labatts for all the ugly women I've slept with."